I’m Home! Now What Do I Do?

A Woman New to Homemaking

        Welcome home!  Congratulations on becoming a homemaker!  The rewards of this role are of inestimable worth!  Below a few things are shared that can help make your transition smooth and have you on your way to sailing into homemaking bliss:

1. Don’t Believe Homemaker Stereotypes - Don’t believe that all homemakers are like June Cleaver or Peg Bundy.  Not all homemakers are excellent, not all homemakers are nurturing mothers, and not all homemakers are lazy, spendthrifts, and ill-kept in appearance.  You are you, and the homemaker you become is completely up to you.  No stereotypes, no molds – break the mold and become the homemaking woman you are created to be!

2. Give Homemaking a Real Chance - Perhaps you’re giving homemaking a try, but really think that you will get bored or not like it much.  Most women who are bored with homemaking fail to really give it the effort it deserves, and if they do, they may fail to explore creativity in homemaking and enrich their lives by volunteer work a few hours a week or month.  Go the extra mile in homemaking and gain the skills required to homemake well, and find joy in creating for your family home.  This is an amazing world full of possibility and happiness, now that you’re here, embrace it and give it all you’ve got!

3. Realize Your Worth in this Role – There is no way to underestimate the value and worth of a devoted homemaker, click here to read a past post that delves into this a bit more, if you’d like, and click here to read “The New Women’s Movement: We’re Coming Home” that explains some of the multitude of things that such a homemaker does and their worth.

4. Don’t Believe that You’ll be Poor - A family can be very well-off financially and rich in many ways, regardless of its size, on the husband’s income alone.  There may be an adjustment phase at the beginning of your being a homemaker in which times are tight financially, but this can be worked-out as you go through it. There is no need to worry that you’ll always have to buy nothing but thrift store items and that your children will have to wear hand-me-downs from others, that you’ll never be able to afford to get your hair done, never have a family vacation, and have to eat cheap, inferior quality foods, all because you don’t provide any income.  You are in a position to be an extraordinarily wise investor, and in so doing, can contribute more to your family’s economy than many women who work outside or inside of the home for money.  Click here and here for two past posts containing information on this subject, if you’d like.

5. You don’t need to Bring in an Income – You’re a homemaker; this is a more than full-time job.  You have a lot of things to do as a homemaker in addition to fulfilling your role as devoted wife and mother.  Your family’s health, safety, welfare, and happiness depends in very large part upon how you do your job as a devoted wife, mother, and homemaker.  Your business, your profession, is making your house a home, which takes a lot of time, thought, and work.  In addition, if you are raising children, especially homeschooling them, you have a full plate.  You can learn to make it on your husband’s income alone, and make it very well.  Learn to live on your husband’s income, to invest it as only you can, and make your house a home and you’ll be extraordinarily rich in far more than money.

6. Enjoy Yourself – Being a devoted wife, mother, and homemaker does require work, but it can be, and is for many women, the most enjoyable, rewarding work on earth.  Enjoy what you’re doing and be creative, let yourself go into creating your family’s one-of-a-kind home and life.  You are free to create a masterpiece home and family, free to take materials or ideas and make them into unique things for your family.  The possibilities of the outstanding life you can create for your family are endless.  Explore this, enjoy this!

7. Educate Yourself – Now that you are a homemaker, you have time to become an extraordinarily well-read woman.  There is a lot to know about decorating, family health, homemaking, and such that can keep you busy learning, and there’s also a wealth of knowledge to be found on probably anything a woman is curious about or would like to know more about.  You have the time to schedule time to learn, to broaden your mind, to really become an outstanding wife, mother, and homemaker as well as a very liberally educated woman.  You needn’t take college courses to do this, just read and self-study.  A well-read homemaker can be extraordinarily interesting to speak with and such a delightful woman to know. 

8. Become Yourself – You have the time to really get to know yourself because you’re your own boss, on your own time, and “running your own show” (as the old saying goes).  You have time to polish-up areas of yourself that need it, time to see things that need changing about yourself and change them, and time to really think about – and create – the life – your life – that you want.  There is no more “what others require of you” like there was at the workplace, it’s what you require of you now.  Your mind and body aren’t working to do a job for someone else for pay, you’re doing a job for you and your family, and you’re free to think about whatever you’d like, not what the boss requires or paying job outside or from the home requires.

9. Build Your Marriage – A happy, healthy marriage is the foundation of the home, so work to make yours the best it can be: one of Celestial Love, mutual dignity and respect, and deep adoration.  To do this, get a copy of the 2007 (the latest) edition of Fascinating Womanhood by Mrs. Helen Andelin, read it, and apply its teachings.  There are online courses and live study groups to go with this book, and participating in one of these is highly recommended.  No matter how clean and materially comfy a home is, if one’s marriage isn’t happy, the home isn’t. 

10. Learn the Skills Necessary to Do Your Job – To be a successful homemaker one needs skill in how to do the job.  There’s sometimes more to many homemaking jobs than meets the eye.  Become an expert and do your job as such.  The book Home Comforts: The Art and Science of Keeping House by Cheryl Mendelson is an outstanding, modern, how-to book for all facets of homemaking, from washing dishes to piano care to caring for books properly to setting the table and everything else!  Get a copy of this book and refer to it for any homemaking job you need to learn how to do, would like to know more about, or would like to learn to do correctly.

~ ~ ~

        Again, welcome home to the world of homemaking!  This world – your world - is completely unique and one-of-a-kind; no one else in the world can make your family’s home what you can.  So much of your family’s life (and remember, you are a part of your family) revolves around the home you create, give them what they (and you) deserve, which is your very best!  Excelsior!

More Time in a Day

Note: This is an very recently updated, 2012 version of an article that was originally published years ago on a couple of different websites (not here).  If a homemaker puts the information found in this article into practice, she will find success with her personal time management and more happiness in homemaking due to doing her job well.  If you are a young homemaker and begin your amazing, God-created role in the home by applying what is taught in this article, you will be starting your home on a solid, made-to-last, quality foundation. 

More Time in a Day

By Mrs. Wayne Hunter

© Copyright 2004 – 2012, All Rights Reserved

Below are some tips on how to make more out of the time that you have.

Pray. Before you begin your day, pray to God.

Don’t be selfish. Your family and you deserve your very best, as well as a clean home and wholesome meals. You all deserve a homemaker who devotes herself to making sure that her family is completely taken care of.

Declutter, thoroughly clean and organize your home. Do this one room at a time. An excellent way to get started is to remember these two things:

  • If it’s not useful or beautiful, throw it out! Have a garbage can and several garbage bags for the garbage, have a box or so for charity, and a box for collectibles, such as heirlooms, that can’t be thrown away but need to be stored. Go through everything, including drawers, closets, bookshelves, corners, cabinets and whatever else is in the room.
  • Next comes the thorough cleaning. Wipe off, dust, polish, wash, scrub; do whatever it takes to get the room thoroughly clean. Don’t forget walls, ceilings and baseboards.

You will most likely find after the decluttering that you have a lot more room to put things, therefore, the organization of your items comes next. Find a space to neatly place everything. Don’t forget: one room at a time is the way to go with this. Trying to declutter, thoroughly clean and organize more than one room at a time can leave you frustrated, take a lot longer, and may be less thoroughly done than going one room at a time. Also, going one room at a time, you can see your results more quickly, thus leading to more motivation to go on to the next room. This is initially time-consuming, good old-fashioned hard work, but the benefits are great. You have a beautiful home, you save a lot of time by maintaining a clean home rather than shuffling a mess and clutter around, and it’s so much easier to maintain a home that is organized and clutter-free. Declutter, thoroughly clean, and organize your home at least twice a year. A suggestion on when to do this would be once in the summer and once in the winter.

Get up earlier and stay up later. This is the golden key to success for the round-the-clock homemaker! The famous Proverbs 31 wife and mother rose while it was yet night and let not her candle go out by night – meaning that she got up early and stayed up late. Don’t deprive yourself of a good night’s sleep, but there is much to be accomplished in these hours. If you have small children or even older ones, set a bedtime for them, and you go to bed a few hours later. While the children are in bed, you can get a whole lot of housework done. You might well be amazed at how much quicker you can get household jobs done when you are on your own time. (This is an especially good time to do jobs that cannot yet be handled by little hands. Your children should obviously be taught to do household chores as they are able during the day, which will eventually free up more of your time.)

Getting up earlier has the same benefits. Both getting up earlier and staying up later also provide the benefit of you having time for yourself. You can do a great deal of reflecting and thinking at these times. You could use some of the time to study. One great way to study while working is to purchase the Scourby Bible CDs. These are audio CDs of the King James Version of the Bible that are outstanding. The reader has such a pleasant voice and reads straight from the Bible; no commentary, nothing but The Pure Word of God; they are so touching. They are a great way to study and an absolutely uplifting way to enjoy your time.  For more information on them, you can visit their website at this link or call 1-800-237-0785.  Scourby readings used to be available with the Old and New Testamanents for sale individually, but this option doesn’t seem to exist anymore. For women looking for an audio version of The Tanakh, click here for purchase and other information about the JPS version. Click here for free book-by-book and chapter-by-chapter mp3 downloads of The Hebrew Bible in the Hebrew language, if you’d like.

By getting up earlier and staying up later, you can enjoy more time with your husband and children, as you won’t be anxious to get the housework done when they need your time and attention. You can tend to their needs instead of being overwhelmed by the amount of work that needs to be done. You will have to figure out what gets done and what doesn’t at these opportune times, but one thing’s for sure: you’ll enjoy the fruits of your labors!

Make most of the food for the day in the early morning. This ensures that you will have healthy food for each meal. An example would be to make three loaves of bread in the early morning while everyone else is sleeping (one loaf per meal), put on a big pot of beans so that they’ll be ready by lunch, and you will have plenty left for supper that you can make chili with in a jiffy. Make homemade pudding so that it can set up well in the refrigerator for lunch and supper. You could also slice and cut fresh fruits and vegetables and put them on trays for the lunch and or supper, make a nice salad, etc. Stews, roasts, soups, and baked items are all good foods to make once for the whole day.  Click here to read more about this.

Make a menu. Each week plan a nutritious menu and then plan once-a-week grocery shopping by it. Having a menu can save you lots of money, as you will have a guide and the groceries on hand to make the meals you have planned, rather than shopping nightly (which can lead to picking up a lot of unnecessary and costly items) or picking up fast foods because you haven’t planned. Also, by planning a menu, you can see in writing your family’s eating habits and correct areas of concern by planning good, wholesome, nutritious, and well-balanced foods for your family.

Observe the Sabbath Day and keep it Holy.

“Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy. Six days shalt thou labor and do all thy work: But the seventh day is the Sabbath of the LORD thy God: in it thou shalt not do any work, thou, nor thy son, nor thy daughter, thy manservant, nor thy maidservant, nor thy cattle, nor thy stranger that is within thy gates: For in six days the LORD made heaven and earth, the sea, and all that in them is, and rested the seventh day: wherefore the LORD blessed the Sabbath day, and hallowed it.” ~ Exodus 20:8-11

This is the fourth of the Ten Commandments. Work the first six days of the week, then rest and enjoy a day off. Sabbath is a beautiful, beautiful day.

“If thou turn away thy foot from the Sabbath, from doing thy pleasure on My holy day; and call the Sabbath a delight, the holy of the Lord, honourable; and shalt honour Him, not doing thine own ways, nor finding thine own pleasure, nor speaking thine own words: Then shalt thou delight thyself in the LORD; and I will cause thee to ride upon the high places of the earth, and feed thee with the heritage of Jacob thy father; for the mouth of the LORD hath spoken it.” ~ Isaiah 58:13-14

Eat not the bread of idleness. Don’t be lazy. Get your work done before you take time for pleasure. Wiling away hours in front of the television, speaking on the phone or in person, spending countless time in front of the computer for entertainment purposes, sitting around reading novels, and such all take a lot bigger chunk out of time than you might imagine. There is a time for taking the time to entertain yourself, but if your husband, children, or you are being neglected in some way, your laundry is out of control, dishes are piled up in the kitchen, or the house is a mess, etc. then it’s time to get busy taking care of things. Idleness will get you nowhere fast. By working hard, you save time and money–not to mention that you feel much better about your family and yourself. Make yourself keep that laundry taken care of and the house clean. It may not be easy at first, but once you get into the swing of it and receive the abundant blessings, it may easily become your way of life.

Give your children age appropriate chores and make sure that they do them. Even a toddler can pick up his own toys and put them in the toy box. There are “chore charts” available, and if you don’t know where to start, maybe you could check into them. You can’t expect a two-year-old to use an adult mop and broom, but he can fold washcloths for you and pick up around the house. There are several things that younger and older children can do to help out around the house, and in teaching them to do so, the child is shown that he is an important part of a functioning family, and you have a little extra help. Make sure that your children are shown exactly how to keep their rooms clean, and then make sure that they do it by having nightly checks about an hour before bed. If the room isn’t to specification, have them get it to specification while you’re in the room. But please do heed this warning about giving your children chores, and this is to not overburden them with adult-sized jobs; that they aren’t given dangerous or exhausting work that is beyond their developmental stage and capacity. Since children are smaller physically and haven’t the amount of years of doing the housework as you, they most often just can’t get the job done as quickly or efficiently as an adult. Give them a chore or two, enough time to do them well, teach them to appreciate the beauty of their work, and then give them plenty of time for play and education. This is especially true of an older girl child. It is very easy to overburden our preteen or teenage daughters when they get old enough to take over a lot of household chores and baby tending. They need to see that Momma works, too – not that she is a taskmaster who wants others to do everything while she relaxes. Work together, and work will become more meaningful and beautiful.

Take time every day to study something of interest to you that is helpful to your family. This is not idly wasting time. A good time to do this is in the morning or night when it’s quiet and after all of the housework is caught up or at nap time for the children. You can also study right alongside of your homeschooling children if you homeschool.

Clean while you go about your work. It’s a whole lot easier and less time-consuming to rinse out a pan that you just cooked in than to wait for hours to do it. It’s a whole lot easier and less time-consuming to mop or wipe up a mess when it happens than it is to leave it to get sticky; not to mention that doing this is a lot more hygienic.

Make a list of all your homemaking jobs and how often they are to be done, then make a schedule. Here’s an example of such a list:

  • Daily: make beds, sweep all floors, wash dishes (as many times a day as needed), prepare three meals and one or two snacks, dust furniture, wash, fold and put away laundry (maybe several times a day, depending on sizes and ages of the members of your family), washing off the bathroom sink, tidying up, etc.
  • Every Other Day: mopping, dusting, etc.
  • Once a Week: thoroughly cleaning the bathroom (may need to be done twice a week, depending on family size), cleaning the furniture, washing and drying bedding (may need to be done more than once a week, depending on your preferences or if the need be), cleaning out and washing out the refrigerator, cleaning outside your home, etc.

Then make a schedule of not only your jobs, but of all the things that you need to get done during the day. Remember, it takes time to adjust to anything new. Don’t become disheartened, worried, or sad if you don’t get everything done the first few tries, but do keep at it and work things out to perfectly suit you and your family. Soon you won’t need charts or schedules or anything like that, and your house will be running much more smoothly. And a great reward for your efforts will be that, God willing, there will come a day when on many days you have everything done and have free time!

A Sweet Love Song to Brighten Your Day

        The song below was popular in the early 1970s and is a very sweet love song for man and wife.   

Someone to Give My Love To

 

~

I could search from now ’til the end of time,

And never find another you.

I’m so glad because I know you’re mine -

Someone to give my love to.

~

I believe, my love, that you’re one of a kind,

For there’s no one else like you.

You’re the light of my life, so, let it shine - 

Someone to give my love to.

~

I find happiness is loving you,

I’ll do my best to make your dreams come true.

~

I will follow you to the ends of the earth,

For my place will be with you.

I have taken you for better or worse -

Someone to give my love to.

~

I find happiness is loving you,

I’ll do my best to make your dreams come true.

~

Days of man and wife time are precious few,

I will spend them all with you.

Then beyond forever I’ll wait for you -

Someone to give my love to.

~ Ends with humming. ~

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